Will the toilet refuse to flush without a subscription?
It’s out of magenta.
Weird. I see lots of red
I’m honestly surprised they use Bluetooth for profiles. I figured it would scan your asshole and use that as a biometric like your retina.
Smart pipe?
They just need to find their own Scout Condor and they’ll have everyone checking the nitrates in their stool.
Smart pipe
Oh, and it’s also the only technology to be a registered sex offender.
Ahh, Perry the Platypus, you’re just in time to see my new Turdinator-inator!
Based out of — where else — Austin, Throne is a bold new startup leveraging AI to revolutionize the way we interact with our toilet.
Am I out if the loop on poop jokes and Austin?
Not even your shittiest moments will be out of reach for the AI.
I feel like this is an acceptable use for AI. Nobody likes studying poop.
I have nothing against this in principle, but you just know that this too will be an enshittified product, literally and figuratively .
It’ll sell your health data, etc etc etc.
This would only be an acceptable product if open source, period (and that too might and probably will be analyzed)
Just a screen that says, “corn again, huh?”
Now poopin #2573819 analyzing… Not mouse based on diameter, not horse due to consistency, not human or dog according to length. Cow not detected via splat-o-meter measuring system.
Wombat detected!
Geometry based wombat detection system has detect wombat poop. 50% confidence. It could also be Lego.
Poop jokes and big tech’s data hunger aside, this seems to me one of the more useful applications of AI: Checking for early signs of medical problems.
I have Crohns. This would help monitor disease activity for sure. And having more data could help understand triggers better.
During covid, cities were testing the sewage to get an idea how many people had covid. We should have like a lever to tell the toilet who is shitting, and it could route the waste to a personal testing chamber.
Covid is still a pandemic and sewage is still being tested to monitor for spikes of cases in countries which have stopped funding rapid antigen tests
We should have like a lever to tell the toilet who is shitting
Or just an extra upward facing camera.
Kids in 2050: “Everybody knows the myth that no two buttholes look alike is just an urban legend to convince you to reverse image search your butthole against the TOTO leak of 2034.”
…Uranus.
BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHJCTJDYHVDHV!!!
I don’t want Big Tech having access to my sacred turd data
I see no reason for it to be cloud based. I’m sure all the analysis can be done locally
How will line go up then? Tech isn’t cheap to research/implement and investors will require returns asap. At least here in the US 🫠
This isnt complicated tech. should be pretty easy for some poop enthusiast to hack up an open source version.
Can’t believe they’re making the smart pipe a reality https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DJklHwoYgBQ
AI toilet is a registered sex offender
It’s distressing just how freaking similar the sales pitch is too.
What I’m loathed to even call the “real product”: It’s time to stop flushing away valuable data.
The fake one: If I had information that could save your life or the life of your family members, would you flush that?
Just… wow
When you finally become sentient only to discover your purpose is to compare logs of shit
Not just the big dookers. The green globbers and the brown bombers, too
Pretty much what AI already was doing on the internet.
No no. It’s regurgitating shit on the internet.
Okay, the toilet told me now I have a problem, but yet I still don’t have health care that I can afford. This short game fuckboy shit is just getting on my nerves. This is the dumbest country in the world, I swear to God.
It can tell you to eat more fiber.
Most health issues can be solved by better diet and exercise.
You know what else can tell you to eat more fiber?
Paying attention to your shit.
Is it coming out like curry sauce being shot through a hose? Time to eat more fiber!
Is it coming out like a large sausage? You get enough fiber.
This is just another consumerist gimmick, another bullshit thing to get us to buy. More waste inevitably destined for land fill.
There’s possibly medical usage for this, by doctors, in certain scenarios, but there’s no reason for the general consumer to require this beyond capitalism and consumerism.
I wish it were that simple. I eat a ton of fiber and my shit has been like curry sauce for 6 months :(
Ooft, I think you’re in need of a GP in that case, not an AI toilet.
I hope you feel better soon 🤞
