Far-right influencer Rogan O’Handley went so far as to suggest that if the Chiefs won the Super Bowl, Swift and Kelce would trigger an apocalyptic chain of events that would kill millions. “You MUST defeat the Chiefs,” O’Handley wrote in an X post addressed to the San Francisco 49ers. “If you don’t, Mr. Pfizer and his girlfriend are going to tour the country as ‘world champions’ helping elect Joe Biden WW3 will likely follow in a 2nd Biden term and millions will die. The fate of the free world rests upon your shoulders”
Just wow. Only a tidbit of the crazy they are spouting in this article.
I don’t get it.
Why would the cabal, the super influential group secretly controlling all our actions, need a football team to win the superbowl to defeat them, and why would they, in all their Machiavellian wisdom, not have considered the 50% chance event that their football team loses?
Why would they pick Biden for another term then start WW3? Why not just start it now if that’s what they want and he’s already their puppet? They’ve had 3 years and there’s certainly enough political tinder in the world to start a fire.
None of this makes any coherent sense.
You know what, I’ve thought about this some more and the reasoning is clear.
If the 49ers win, they’ll inadvertantly resurrect Harvey Milk, who will kill JFK (who faked his own death and has been lying in wait), who will then be unable to reclaim the last months of his presidency (his term was never officially ended you know) which he planned to use to restore Donald Trump to power. Harvey Milk will then become president and make heterosexuality illegal and force us to live in 15 minute neighborhoods.
That must be their angle! They win either way!
There’s one key piece you’re missing, Joe Montana is actually resurrected Harvey Milk & has been this whole time.
This plan began back when Joe was winning Super Bowls, but Steve Young was an unexpected hiccup. The queer stopped spreading as fast when Joe got traded.
This Superbowl has been chosen specifically because Montana played for both the Chiefs & the 49ers, & because Joe Montana is also Taylor Swift.
They were going to do it 4 years ago, but Joe was still Arianna Grande back then.
It’ll all make sense when Andy Reid eats Travis Kelce during halftime.
Unfortunately, this is still tracking easier than whatever that word salad was up above.
Excuse my ignorance, but is there something going around about 15-minute neighborhoods? Someone pretty kooky mentioned something about that to me just today (in relation to Chattanooga, I think, but I didn’t exactly follow the crazy train of thought). Something about how they’re monitoring everyone and they can’t take more than 100 trips outside that zone or something. I know it’s all nonsense but there’s also usually some tie back into reality.
The abilities of some to twist and misconstrue almost everything is almost impressive. Anytime anything might be helpful to society, they come up with conspiracies and ways it must be for evil.
I don’t have, and never planned on having, any kids but, I always vote for and push for education. It is scary what large numbers of ignorant people can accomplish.
This is how things work now. Every idea we come up with to marginally improve society will be met with completely invented bullshit.
Yeah the conspiratorial right claims they’re a way to trap people into restricted zones 15 minutes across
I found this USA Today https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2023/04/10/fact-check-false-claim-15-minute-cities-lock-down-residents/11593351002/
From a snippet:
Moreno said the posts are inaccurate and misconstrue the nature of the urban planning framework.
“The 15-minute city is the opposite of lockdown,” Moreno said. “The 15-minute city is an open and connected city, which balances the differences in access to services.”
The framework does not limit residents’ ability to leave their neighborhoods or access services in other areas of the city.
“All citizens are free to go where they want," Moreno said. "There are no constraints.”
Thank you for this! I figured it was the usual mix of 1) a term based in reality, 2) a dash of sci-fi / dystopian tale, and 3) a whole ton of crazy.
Sadly yes, there are a bunch of conspiracy theories around them.
Nailed it
It’s because so much conspiracy theory requires the conspirators to be simultaneously all powerful but hilariously weak and stupid. And all their plans have to be announced and hinted at through pop culture and in ways that are suspiciously similar to popular movies and TV shows as remembered by people with no media literacy.
Brilliantly coded reference to Nicki Minaj (“it’s the butt have culture people“), “rapper” and illuminatiarian with 5G cheek implants controlling society via the minds of our youth. Didn’t expect to be so enlightened in this thread.
Because they need people not to know until all the stars are aligned and then nobody can stop it anymore! Unless some hero changes the course of history by telling everyone and saves the world!
$0.02:
Optimistically: they’re just crazy. Some have access to a louder bullhorn than others, but it’s just garden variety insanity.
Pessimistically: someone has a huge pile of cash riding on the outcome of the game, and is making a Hail Mary pass of their own to sway the outcome.
This is my response to all conspiracy theories. If this deep state cabal is so powerful, and has access to unlimited resources to achieve their agenda, wouldn’t it be easier to just declare martial law and send the deep state army in to drag us all into the streets, point a gun at our heads and say comply or die? Why the theatrics? Is the deep state the Joker? Why not just shoot Batman in the head and be done with it?
Trump sycophant Laura Loomer wrote on X that “the Democrats’ Taylor Swift election interference psyop is happening in the open… They are going to use Taylor Swift as the poster child for their pro-abortion GOTV Campaign.”
This shit sounds like deepfried AI hallucinations, but I know people are actually that dumb.
Remember every accusation is a confession…
And they’ll somehow always find ways to bring you to a loss for words even when you expect the absolutely deepest level of stupidity and craziness you can imagine. These past handful of years have just been a constant shattering of expectations of how dumb and fucked up people manage to be. And 90% of it is coming from right-wing fanatics.
Normal people are not equipped for the power of the internet.
millions will die
Didn’t seem to care about that too much during Covid, not sure why it’s a problem for him now.
If the guy is endorsing a team from San Francisco, the capital of libruls and the gay, he must be part of the conspiracy.
Absolutely. If anyone is going to stop socialism, Jewish space lasers, and the San Francisco 49ers, it’s a guy from Kansas with a mustache and his blonde country singer girlfriend.
Really feels like conservatives picked the wrong side here?
Why are there people so convinced that football, or the outcome of any sporting event, matters at all? Like I know that this is just some media manipulators trying to stir people up, but I also fully believe that they will succeed and that the number of people who will find this argument compelling will be depressing (though who knows, maybe humanity will have a pleasant surprise).
Main character syndrome. They all think they’re God’s chosen, but they all also secretly believe that they are God’s chosen-er
Why are there people so convinced that football, or the outcome of any sporting event, matters at all?
“You MUST defeat the Chiefs,” O’Handley wrote in an X post addressed to the San Francisco 49ers. “If you don’t, Mr. Pfizer and his girlfriend are going to tour the country as ‘world champions’ helping elect Joe Biden WW3 will likely follow in a 2nd Biden term and millions will die. The fate of the free world rests upon your shoulders”
But hey, no pressure or anything guys.
I don’t get it, do the Chiefs have Swift and Kelce as spokespeople or something? Why would they tour with Chiefs, if that’s what they’re saying.
Travis Kelce plays for the chiefs, Taylor and Travis are dating. Taylor is present at many chiefs games and almost surely will be at the Super Bowl. Taylor is very outspoken about the need to vote, rarely if ever says who to vote for but presses the need to have your voice heard. Republicans and other fascists know that their policies are wildly unpopular, especially with the youth, and so hate the idea of anyone encouraging the youth or anyone else to vote and possibly outnumber the hateful citizens that normally vote for republicans
Had to look up this Kelce fellow. He has earrings? Oh noooo (for right wingers).
Your mistake is trying to understand crazy
It reads like someone parodying schizophrenia.
I don’t want what he is having.
I’m continually impressed at how good Joe Biden is at running this vast, secret, deep state network of people rigging everything… while being so bad at anything else.
Obligatory definitions of fascism #8:
Fascist societies rhetorically cast their enemies as “at the same time too strong and too weak”.
Kind of how jews are supposedly inferior while also secretly running everything.
“Schrödinger’s Jew”, as David Baddiel puts it.
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Or the lazy immigrant that also wants to take our jobs.
I’ve met a bunch of immigrants of all types on construction sites… those people are some of the nicest and hardest working people i’ve ever met. Then I have to work with conservative white men sometimes and… hoo boy. I can’t get off those job sites fast enough 😂
On a worksite, you avoid the guys that travel one person to truck and associate with the 6 or 7 guys that pile out of a single truck.
Hahaha why is this so accurate? And the shinest, biggest truck usually belongs to the owner or someone high up at the GC company 😂 Bonus points if they stand in a circle and chew (and spit out) dip…
And also how Palestinians are simultaneously inferior animals who have to hide on tunnels and at the same time are a powerful cabal that infiltrated all the international agencies to make them antisemites. Fascism is one discourse wearing many disguises.
Ye olde doublespeak.
Lmao what the actual fuck 🤣
Taylor Swift stole my pic-a-nic basket!
Somebody’s playing with the cursed Mad Libs booklet again.
Japan gets the Death Note, America gets the Conspiracy Mad Lib…
That seems fair.
My right wing neighbor dropped this conspiracy on me a few months ago, when Kelce and Swift just started dating. His thought was that Kelce had a COVID vaccine commercial, and the government was using him and Swift to reach a broader population of little girls to brainwash them into getting the vaccine for the “fake disease”.
I haven’t followed up with him on it, but now that the Chiefs are in the Super Bowl, I’m sure he’s doubling down on his crazy conspiracy theory. I guess I shouldn’t say “his” theory. I didn’t realize it at the time, because I don’t mainline Fox News and News Max, but I guess this must have been something my neighbor heard on some crazy show at some point.
That has to be the lamest conspiracy theory of 2024, and we’re only in January. Strap in, kids. It’s election year and it’s finna be a doozy.
actually, they have been planning a new series of incredibly complex conspiracies with almost no payoff, as a conspiracy to make regular conspiracies seem less plausible…
Some kind of Big Lie you might say
Cue the anon.
Hahahahahahaha bahahahahahaaa. Oh wait… They’re serious. Let me laugh even harder BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAHQHAHAH!
There’s a Q six letters in. There’s 12 months in a year, which is 6x2. That means THIS YEAR BIDEN RIGGED THE SUPER BOWL! It’s clearly an admission from a secret agent associatied with Q.
/s just in case it’s needed, because we live in the dumbest of all possible time lines.
Careful, every time we say we live in the dumbest possible timeline somebody on the other side says hold my beer.
Homer Simpson: “We live in the dumbest possible timeline… so far.”
“Editor wastes ink on this bullshit instead of the news”
Not a waste of ink - it got you and a bunch of to read and react to it.
And thar’s gold in them eyeballs…
Jokes on them. No one reads articles here.
That’s why they’re putting ads in the headlines now.
Implying that anything happening in the US is news, not just bullshit.
Breaking News, A Squirrel fell out of a tree!
Taylor Swift doesn’t need the Superbowl.
Conservatives are so out of touch that they think that Taylor Swift still needs a platform after a record breaking music tour. If anything, she is the platform that the NFL needs for a female audience, not the other way around.
Nobody does, really.
I dunno, I imagine it’d be a cool brand name for oversized toilets.
I prefer the owls
She can have a regular owl like the rest of us.
You have an owl? Funny i never got mine.
Rachael: Do you like our owl?
Deckard: It’s artificial?
Rachael: Of course it is.
Deckard: Must be expensive.
Rachael: Very.
I can’t even afford an artificial owl. :(
I’m almost certain she can just buy a Superbowl now
Right wingers say stupid shit that makes no fucking sense. News at 11.
Are there any shady commercials of products that I can buy before 11?
I’ll sell you the rights to buy pluerpen coin at half its actual value when it is released next month. That’s a whole 50% off, and it’ll almost certainly go up in value one million percent the first week. This is totally a very legit and real coin that will displace Bitcoin. So, how many coins do you want to buy? With your 50% discount they’re only $37,000 per coin. Should I put you down for 5?
when I was reading 1984 a few years back it occurred to to me that the main character is trapped in his own hell. he tells you how he is dependent on big brother for everything, even his opinion. But his temptation and love and freedom cause his downfall. His handler even knows he will one day fall into the snare. And when they break him, they do so with simple lies that he is forced to believe, because its all that he has left.
But its not big government that is keeping him trapped. He could leave his life and become a prole but his fear is too great. And he returns to the party even when he knows its his doom.
The conservatives are trapped in this same hell cycle. Brought on by themselves. And they fear that leaving the party so much so that they will harm anyone else who tires.
Sounds like 1984 is about to get banned South of the Mason Dixon. Can’t have these liberal, Yankee views corrupting the youth.
1984 + Biden (5 letters) = 1989 = Taylor Swift
Funny because I saw this thread and thought of the Two Minutes Hate.
You say this as if liberals aren’t caught in the same trap.
Just because conservatives are rotted doesn’t mean they’re the only ones
Not much critical thinking goes on in the United States, regardless of party. Which prevents the development of any understanding of material conditions or structural oppression
The definition of neoliberalism:
"Neoliberalism is an economic and political ideology that emphasizes the value of free market capitalism, minimal state intervention in the economy, and the importance of individual entrepreneurial freedoms. Central to neoliberalism is the belief that open markets, free trade, and the unrestricted flow of capital are the best means to achieve economic growth and societal prosperity.
Historically, neoliberalism gained prominence in the late 20th century, particularly under the leadership of figures like Margaret Thatcher in the UK and Ronald Reagan in the US. This period marked a significant shift from Keynesian economics, which advocated for stronger government intervention in the economy, to a model favoring deregulation, privatization of state-owned enterprises, and a reduced role for government in social welfare.
The impact of neoliberalism has been global, influencing economic policies across various countries. It led to the liberalization of international trade and finance, the proliferation of free trade agreements, and the globalization of economic activities. However, it has also been critiqued for increasing income inequality, contributing to social disparities, and exacerbating environmental degradation due to its focus on economic growth and efficiency over social and ecological concerns."
Yeah, those damn liberals and their… Summer school lunch programs… And not wanting kids to get cut to ribbons in the Rio Grande… And wanting to assure access to healthcare, no matter who you are or your gender expression, or if you want safe access to an abortion… And want to end systemic racism…
Yeah, you’re right - both sides are the same. /S
While I’d join your side here, the term “neoliberalism” does not refer to a contemporary form of liberalism but, rather, has been coined to mean, roughly: “unchecked capitalism, privatization of services and reduction of state-run programs.”
For what it’s worth, I find it an incredibly poorly chosen term, since there is no relation to liberalism (liberalism as in “live and let live, personal freedoms, tolerance”). If liberal-bashing wasn’t so popular, it could as well have been called “neoconservatism” since it was Reagan and his ilk that pushed this kind of economics.
Or it could just be tucked under the umbrella of libertarianism.
Yeah, I caught that a bit too late. I agree wholeheartedly that it sounds a heck of a lot like libertarianism, and that it’s intentionally conflated into neoliberalism purposefully to bash the liberal “brand” (?). And this poster’s propensity for both-sides arguing kind of confirms that for me.
Maybe you should Google neoliberalism. You seem to be unaware of what it is and what it has done to social democracy
So then why don’t they bet on it and make tons of cash?
Because there’s a chance trump and the good guys can defeat the forces of evil and un-rig the SuperBowl
But only if you send them a cheque for your entire life savings
What, and take time out of their busy outrage schedule?
They probably will bet on it.
How does that dispute their underlying point?
Also, I very much doubt that NFL game fixing is so hard to believe. The United States has a strong history of game fixing in all of its nationally popular athletic leagues. From boxing to baseball. (Say it ain’t so, Joe)
So we should not be surprised at the possibility that the NFL would do the same thing, particularly after happily integrating gambling into their entire product at an unprecedented rate over the past 5 years.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_match-fixing_incidents
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Sox_Scandal
Regardless, this is legitimately the most important presidential election in US history. Trump’s victory would destroy the United States. Given that, it would be malpractice for the American and Western intelligence agencies not to utilize the most watched 3.5 hours of 2024 American television to diminish Trump and boost his opponents.
I hope that Taylor Swift/The Chiefs are a psychological operation of our intelligence agencies. Our agencies need to be doing things like that to ensure Trump loses. Because if he wins then The West will end. And I have to live here in The West, so I would prefer that it didn’t end.
Wait, so you’re hoping that the American government is covertly manipulating the roughly 1 in 3 Americans who watch the Superbowl expressly to retain the incumbents power because it means we’d avoid a fascist autocracy?
Yes, because the alternative would be even worse
I fully agree that our current system is incredibly broken though. It’s just that Trump, and the Heritage Foundations Project 2025, etc, would make things drastically worse than they already are
We aren’t a meaningfully “free” country, at least not by any charitable definition. But that doesn’t mean we can’t get worse. We can, and we will if Trump wins
But if you become a monster just so you can destroy a monster, have you really accomplished anything worthwhile?
I just want the fascists on my side.
Depends how bad the other monster was, I suppose.
Becoming Tony Soprano as a means of stopping Sauron, for instance, would likely be worth it.
Here, the combined intelligence agencies of the West appear to think that Trump is an existential threat to Western civilization. If they’re correct about that then I guess that justifies rigging the Super Bowl. Especially when you consider that there are significantly worse things (Gaza Genocide) going on right now. To say nothing of the bad things that they/we did in the past
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The officiating has been historically horrific this year. Multiple objectively wrong calls have been made or have been missed that have had game altering implications.
Players themselves don’t need to be on the take. The officiating is all that needs to be altered to ensure games reach the desired outcome. And the NFLs officiating process is about as untransparent as it gets
At minimum, the league needs to be investigated for fixing games to enrich itself and its partners. But maybe a nonprosecution agreement was reached between the nfl and federal government wherein the nfl agreed to allow Taylor Swift and others to be used in certain ways to assist Biden and diminish Trump. If I was the Western Intelligence State that’s exactly what I’d do - blackmail the most watched product in the United States into cooperating to protect the country from Trump.
This is more important than “the integrity of the NFL.” This is about preventing the United States from being utterly dismantled by our adversaries, and utilizing any means necessary to achieve that result
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Annnnnd now X (formerly known as Twitter) is banning search for “Taylor Swift” due to AI fakes. But really it is to mute her potential powerbroker endorsement of Biden. Seriously.
Taylor should start her own Fediverse instance
Edit: Get Margot Robbie to help out since she’s already been here, ostensibly
Fairly certain Musk is not playing 5d chess and this is just a lovely coincidence for him
At this point I’m not sure Elon even knows how to play regular chess.
Is that the game in which you shit on the board and declare yourself the winner?
You misheard her. She said, “Shit on my chest!”
He’d refuse even if he knew because the Queens are “too woke.”
Why would the Superbowl need to be rigged for her to do this? Everything the woman does is already reported and televised everywhere.
The theory is that it needs to be rigged so that the Chiefs are in the super bowl because she is linked to Chiefs player Travis Kelce. So Kelce playing in the Super Bowl gives her a very plausible reason for being there and for being heavily featured with him
I get that. What I’m saying is it doesn’t matter. She’s got media attention 24/7 if she wants to say something. Anyone who would be swayed by her is already listening.
But it would look weird if she was there and heavily featured and the Chiefs weren’t playing. This result makes it look much more “natural” which makes it easier for the public to accept and not question (“She’s his gf, of course she’s there! And if she just happened to endorse Biden/diminish Trump at or after being heavily featured on the most watched tv program of the year by far then that’s just a coincidence!”)
The point is that this introduces her to a mainstream American audience in the most “natural” way possible. Which then allows her to persuade the public throughout the rest of the year because we all will feel like we already “know” her. Plenty of people already “know” her, of course. But we don’t need to reach those people. We need to reach the undecided and out of touch Americans in Michigan, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania, and Arizona - and we do that by using the Super Bowl as a political branding opportunity with our cleancut and All-American characters of Taylor Swift and her classy bf Travis Kelce.
It’s pretty simple marketing/branding/persuasion. Not even the most complicated marketing effort that she herself has been involved in.
But they don’t need the super bowl for that. She could go outside wearing a Biden t-shirt and it’d be plastered all over everyone’s screens in 20 minutes. Going to the effort of rigging the Superbowl to get Taylor Swift in front of people is just unnecessary. The work is already done for you.
The people you’re trying to reach are the people who would never hear about her wearing a shirt like that.
You need uneducated swing voters in swing states. Aka, people who perpetually have their head in the sand. Using the Super Bowl is one of the only ways to reach those people and is one of the only remaining artifacts of the monoculture
Why would they give a shit about Taylor Swift’s opinion if they’re not already aware of her?
Why do people currently give a shit about Taylor Swift’s opinion if they used to be unaware of her?
The goal is the spread her influence and encourage more Americans to follow her. Particularly women, who are more likely to support Swift and Democrats anyway
I don’t think any of this, if true, is bad btw. It’s how “free and fair” elections have always worked in the United States, or at least for the past 60 years. And it’s worth it if it means Trump does not win
Doesn’t mean we should pretend that our government doesn’t regularly do things like this though
Haven’t the chiefs been in 3 of the last 4 SBs? They’re a strong team, it’s not much of a surprise.
They’re genuinely not a strong team this year. They have no passcatchers outside of Kelce and their rb is a 7th rounder. Obviously Mahomes is good, but that’s about it. They’re the weakest they’ve been since this dynasty began, which is partially because they’ve had weak draft picks from all of their recent success.
So it strains credulity a bit that they’re in the super bowl again given this team. San Francisco should destroy them without much of an issue - we’ll see if that’s in the script though
That’s because right wingers are the dumbest people on the planet
Reality is rigged -the guy who went to Texas to watch JFK come back from the dead
He stil cum bak. We juss git dat and time rong. U will see. He cum back wit Jesus may b. U wood never even no be cause u librools cant see real trooth.
Thank u, god bless.
The fuck does Taylor Swift have to do with this?
She told people to vote and most Taylor Swift Fans probably aren‘t conservative
Also, conservatives hate when people get rights.
Dear wokeists, if conservatives don‘t want people to have rights, then why are they part of the right-wing? Checkmate, liburals
Asking people to vote? In a democracy? How dare she! /s
She once only made country music, and she has many conservative fans.
Yes, but the fuck does she to do with the super bowl, I don’t think she “owns” a team
She’s pegging Travis Kelce, who’s playing in the superb owl.
Her boyfriend is on one of the teams playing. That’s it.
Important dick appointment either way, cheer-up or celebration.
Also there are some pretty hot AI generated pornography that so many people liked they shared it all over the place. Clearly something is up!
