Sometimes, I open the fridge (or a cabinet) and just see some condiment (mostly hot sauce) and realize it will dictate my diet for the next month.
Like today. I opened my bachelor/nihilist fridge and saw a bottle of Walmart steak sauce. Now, I know, I guess I must eat steak inspired meals, or ground beef inspired meals, or whatever but my favorite is over easy eggs with steak sauce. Or, any sandwich. Also, boiled potatoes, because I am a genius that hates themself. Also green vegetables.
Sriracha is similar. I see it and think, “oh, you TEASE!” and then put on a pot of rice and start blanching all my veggies.
I see some local “Louisiana Hot Sauce” in my hot sauce cabinet? Looks like I’m eating pizza for a few weeks because I love the dipping options.
I’m sure this has been a big, annoying, reddit/Lemmy monstrosity of a conversation already; I just wanted to ask what anyone else was assigned to eat by the Condiment Royal Family/Lineage/deity to obey this morning.
I will always remember fondly my days in the Savannah, serving under Colonel Mustard. It left a great impression on me, like the burn marks on a frankfurter. They’re on my upper right arm, because the Colonel thought I was one of the enemy one night while he was in his cups and sought to grill me. Well, he certainly gave me the third degree I’ll give him that. Yes, yes, I remember my days in the sweltering heat, in the Savannah. Under the command of Colonel Mustard.
Some may ask where I got these lines. It was Colonel Mustard, in the Savannah, with the potato masher.