APAB, no exceptions

Probably “It’s Alright Ma (I’m Only Bleeding)”

AAAAAHHH!!!

I’m getting too much money!

I’m partial to the New Orleans cocktails. If I’m making a Sazerac, I like this variation.

On the whole, though, my favorite has to be the Vieux Carré

• 3/4 oz rye
• 3/4 oz cognac
• 3/4 oz sweet vermouth
• 1/3 oz Bénédictine D.O.M
• 2 dashes Peychaud’s bitters
• 1 dash Angostura bitters
• Optional absinthe rinse (I usually keep some absinthe in an atomizer because I refuse to throw out perfectly good absinthe)

Serve in a rocks glass with a lemon twist

At the same time, though, my love for bitter sometimes draws me to a Bonsoni:

• 2 oz Carpano Antica vermouth
• 1/2 oz Fernet Branca

It didn’t even show me a blank page. It just turned off my screen

They were. And I still tipped the amount the pancakes would have been

I once waited 3.5 hours for free pancakes at IHOP. I had a shit week and just wanted some free pancakes, but they accidentally crossed my name out before even seating me, so I saw multiple groups arrive after, eat, and leave before my dumbass thought “maybe I should say something.”

Also, my phone was dead for the last 2 hours of that.

I love the actual product, but loathe the attempts at feigning some sort of progressivism that always manages to put on blast the fact that its founder was a center-right Spanish politician.

Also, Hazel Southwell is literally right there.

What’s Mizzou’s bowl game ban looking like?

Some of the smaller racing subs, especially IndyCar and MotoGP

That sounds like the other side of my dad’s experience. He was a mid-level district manager whose primary job, alongside managing a district of grocery stores under a certain Ohio-based conglomerate, was serving as the barrier between the incompetent good-ol-boys C-suite and the people who actually know what they are doing. The two worst offenders were his immediate boss, the regional VP who we’ll call Jane, and the company VP, who we’ll call James. James was probably the biggest Trump fan, in that he mimicked his behavior: a chauvinist braggart who was quick to anger and honestly had no right to be that high up aside from his relationships. Promotions for him were a way to reward his friends or those who… “accommodated” him, like one store manager who, despite having not passed the evaluation, still got a store director promotion due to his intervention. Jane, meanwhile, was a kiss-ass whose management style started and ended at anger and threats. Both were Dunning-Kruger personified and my dad had to spend most of his time taking their useless and unrealistic demands and translating them into something halfway-workable in the store, while making sure the managers were ready to revert to whatever dumbass preferences they had the instant one of the two came in for a store walk (something they only did when absolutely required around the holidays, because god forbid they actually manage or something).

He was successful at serving as the barrier, and he commanded immense respect within the district, to the point that when I got my first job working in an adjacent district, the managers (many of whom were hired away from competitors by my dad when the store was still under his purview) still spent a lot of time talking about how much they respected him. That said, he could only take so much, and he knew he had no chance of promotion as long as he stayed there. A while back, he finally got a chance for change, as there was an opening working for the flagship brand of the conglomerate. It was a lateral move, but there was a chance for upward mobility, it was halfway across the country in a place with better weather, and, most importantly, it offered a chance to get the hell away from James and Jane. However, that meant the barrier he erected was gone, and all of a sudden, the micromanagement and bullshit of the c-suite was unleashed on his district. While corporate was happy to get an opponent to their reign of terror brilliance out of their way, the actual rank-and-file, many of whom still remained good friends with my dad, could barely stand it. Every week was a new update on which store manager or department manager ended up quittinf and going to which competitor, all because James and Jane just couldn’t help themselves.

(As an aside, and just to give an idea of my dad’s management capabilities, when his replacement (a toady who had tried and failed to undermine him and get him fired) himself got fired due to someone needing to get thrown under the bus a pretty bad manager evaluation error, the store managers started calling him for advice, and he basically ended up spending his free time serving as unofficial district manager from halfway across the country as a favor to his old store managers. While appreciated, it did not stop the shitstorm.)

While the exodus was pretty bad, it looks like it ended up being pretty short-lived. Right before he left, the conglomerate installed a new president hired from outside of the company. James was supposed to be the next in line if looking at the company hierarchy, but was passed over. (Another aside, they needed some fresh ideas badly. Even beyond the c-suite fuckery, the company in general was stubborn and overly set in its ways, even rejecting some ideas about tech and home shopping from the conglomerate that would have dragged them into the 21st century in favor of continuing to do things “their way”). The new president took a few months to get situated, but when she finally got adjusted, heads started rolling. First, James. I still don’t have all of the details, but he was gone a few months after my dad left. Maybe the misconduct caught up to him, maybe he was still livid about not getting the promotion, maybe it had to do with his son (also an unqualified store manager. Go figure) getting arrested for assault.

As soon as he left, it was only a matter of time for Jane, and about 6 months later, she was gone. According to her Facebook, she left to “go into teaching” (a lot of incredulous laughter was shared at the dinner table when he read that), but we all knew what happened: the exodus was bad in the region, and now that James couldn’t protect her, and after some time to see if she would adjust or remain the same, the president presented her with two options: quietly walk away, or receive a not-so-quiet boot out the door. Either way, the worst of the worst was gone, but the damage was done. A lot of good managers left in the year after my dad left the company, and regaining that level of talent assembled will take a long time, especially as other competitors are eyeing expansion into that district.

As for my dad, he’s doing great with the conglomerate, has built up a similar rapport with his new managers, and may have a promotion on the way (especially if the FTC decides to not do its job and permits a large merger to go through).