My family tends to be less concerned with our remains. My grandfather used to say that when he died we should just “jam a ham bone up my ass and let the dogs drag me away.”

Never quite understood what the purpose of the ham bone up the ass was, but I don’t judge. No kink-shaming.

Edit: I should add, we did not shove anything up his ass and let the dogs drag him away. He was cremated. His instructions were to proceed with the cremation immediately with no time for family to say goodbye. However, my grandmother and my father (only child) decided to ignore that. We met at the funeral home before the cremation and just sat in the room with him.

To this day, he’s still the best looking dead person I’ve ever seen. He was dead, and he looked it, but he looked like himself. Just dead. He looked normal, not some plastic, uncanny-valley version of himself that someone thought he should look like.