Conveniences, automation, safety plans, etc. Everyone loves winging it and having piles of chores, but then they complain about life being hard, but then they don’t change anything
A ton of automation and ‘convenience’ being sold is terribly thought out or makes life more complex than not having it.
Smart bulbs are way more work to set up than they are worth for me, a light switch works fine. Cruise control is nice, but lane assist drives me nuts with all the false positives. Generally the overwhelming number of chores comes from just having too many things in the first place.
Fewer, simpler operating things are more enjoyable for me than a lot of complex automated things that don’t do what I want them to do.
I have smart switches, mostly because I’m a tinkerer and build and repair things for fun. I work in IT, so I don’t trust any of this. But the switches work like normal for people not used to it. While I also have a button that turns all the lights off in the whole house at once.
My main automations are basically timers. They turn lights on and off at sunrise/down. And one that turns on my backdoor lights when my garage door opens.
As for cars, I totally agree. Adaptive cruise control is the extent of the smart I want in a car. I’ve had too many false positives where the car will automatically apply the brakes when it didn’t need to. And not once where I was in danger of crashing. Once on a bend in the road where a car was parked on the side and another where an RV had pulled to the side on a turn out to let people pass and the car freaked out because it didn’t realize the road turned.
I’ve also had it nudge the wheel too often when I’m purposely hugging one side of the lane because there is construction or a car on the side of the road.
ton of automation and ‘convenience’ being sold is terribly thought out or makes life more complex than not having it.
People burning alive in Teslas because we don’t want those unsightly door handles comes to mind.
I also hate push buttons for things like starting the engine or shifting the gear mode. Please let me physically move something instead of pushing a button more than once so I don’t have to take my eyes away from my surroundings in a parking lot.
I had to get a rental car for work earlier this month. It took 10 minutes of YouTube to figure out how to turn the goddamn parking break off. So convenient.
InTuItIvE dEsIgN
I think automation in general has been in an awkward stage for a while, maybe analogous to adolescence or puberty. At some point our immediate world will become truly automated, able to sense what we need or want and provide it with very minimal setup and instruction, like a cocoon of personal convenience. Right now it’s more like a 19th century vision of a house of the future with pulleys and wires everywhere - we haven’t gotten rid of the pulleys and wires, we’ve just moved them into apps.
At some point our immediate world will become truly automated, able to sense what we need or want and provide it with very minimal setup and instruction
This will never happen for me because every single instance of ‘user friendly’ I can think of is the opposite of what I want. Yeah, I don’t notice the things that work, but I notice a lot of counter intuitive automation that does the opposite of what I want it to do.
Not to mention that some days I want an app or process to function one way, but on other days I might want it to function the opposite way, depending on my needs. There is no mechanism for the app to guess which way I want it to function, if such a change is even possible without reconfiguring all the settings.
I have that my android phone ditched the ability to swipe up in three spots and replaced it with a single swipe up you have to hold to do what I could do with a quick swipe before. There is no reason they needed to remove a perfectly functional and simple option to add one. They kept the option to have three buttons at the bottom to take up acreen space, why not have three options?
A ton of automation and ‘convenience’ being sold is terribly thought out or makes life more complex than not having it.
Yeah, not EVERYTHING is an internet controlled dishwasher that locks up when updating so no one can hack it.
Smart bulbs are way more work to set up than they are worth for me, a light switch works fine.
Not everything is Philips Hue™®© overcomplicated overpriced nonsense with hubs and accounts and crap. Off brands are much easier. I love being able to just switch the light off from my phone without having to get up, and turn it on without needing to reach for a switch in the dark. Or better, have them turn on automatically at times I’d be needing them. Or have motion controlled lights that only turn on if motion is detected between sunset and sunrise times.
Cruise control is nice, but lane assist drives me nuts with all the false positives.
My electric scooter has that, and I don’t use it, seems too risky especially in an area where people without cars are hated more than literal terrorists.
Generally the overwhelming number of chores comes from just having too many things in the first place.
Not entirely wrong, but everyone manages to overcomplicate the simplest chores possible.
Fewer, simpler operating things are more enjoyable for me than a lot of complex automated things that don’t do what I want them to do.
The best automation solutions are the non-electric ones. It can be as simple as having an easy routine like only scooping cat litter whenever you use the toilet.
If you like automation and don’t want to rely on the cloud (aka the big data corpos) then you could try our lord and saviour Home Assistant.
🙌 Praise Home Assistant 🙌
All of you writing cogent arguments and being philosophical should step back and realize this whole thread is an unpaid advertisement for amazon subscription groceries written by someone who thinks they were saved by a job there.
I’m glad this is the top comment because lordy have mercy, what is OP on about.
I don’t think i was saved. I was saved.
And it’s not only about subscribe & save, but other solutions. I just feel super alone like everyone wants to have hours of chores instead of making them easier. There are solutions that cost nothing, like having an easy routine or combining a chore with something you do every day. Like, just taking out the trash earlier in the day costs nothing. But family insists on keeping themselves awake waiting until 11:59:59PM to take out the trash which takes hours because one person keeps over-overbuying produce and never using it all. Like, buy less of it, and take out the trash earlier. That SAVES money for fucks sake
I just feel super alone like everyone wants to have hours of chores instead of making them easier.
Why do you care about how other people choose to spend doing their chores? You seem angry for things that don’t affect you. Focus on your own life.
They agree with that family’s mother.
Oh.
I opened the thread thinking, “this has to be a bait post where the op just soapboxes about how much better at life they are than everyone else, and argues with literally everyone offering perspective” and I’m glad to see I was not wrong! Boy if your replies aren’t some of the least self aware, most elitist stuff I’ve seen here so far.
I dunno man, why doesn’t everyone with actual problems just ahh, buy an Android phone, learn how to program or do whatever the hell else you think everyone should be doing to just simply live the obviously better life that you have?
Oh wait, not everyone has the same opportunities as everyone else, and so not only may these options be unavailable to a lot of people, they may also be completely useless in solving someone’s difficult life.
You sound like a Tech Bro in their early twenties who landed a sweet job out of college (that they didn’t pay for) and wonders why people choose to be homeless. And before you try to correct me, that’s what you sound like, so unless that’s the persona you wanna give off, maybe try to listen to what people are saying instead of trying to find out how they’re wrong.
Do you really think people with “difficult lives” are so stressed out because they forgot to take the garbage out multiple times? Seriously? Christ 😂
Good its not just me.
Thank god my smart phone can spell sanctimonious for me, its made my life so much easier.
Oooh, what a beautiful word! It’d fallen out of my vocab. Thanks for that.
I opened the thread thinking, “this has to be a bait post where the op just soapboxes about how much better at life they are than everyone else, and argues with literally everyone offering perspective” and I’m glad to see I was not wrong! Boy if your replies aren’t some of the least self aware, most elitist stuff I’ve seen here so far.
bruh what. I’m just traumatized, not elitist.
I dunno man, why doesn’t everyone with actual problems just ahh, buy an Android phone, learn how to program or do whatever the hell else you think everyone should be doing to just simply live the obviously better life that you have?
That’s ONE solution out of countless. I’m saying anyone can make a solution that works for themselves whether it’s tech based or not.
Oh wait, not everyone has the same opportunities as everyone else, and so not only may these options be unavailable to a lot of people, they may also be completely useless in solving someone’s difficult life.
Everyone has the opportunity to improve their lives. If you’re working and making money then you can make your life exactly the way you want it to be. It takes time and effort, yeah, but it’s not impossible.
You sound like a Tech Bro in their early twenties who landed a sweet job out of college (that they didn’t pay for) and wonders why people choose to be homeless. And before you try to correct me, that’s what you sound like, so unless that’s the persona you wanna give off, maybe try to listen to what people are saying instead of trying to find out how they’re wrong.
Nah I’m a 27 year old who was locked away for 20 years, and I’ve only got to live and experience life for 3 years. I landed a sweet job at ✨ Amazon ✨ I do love technology (well, technology that isn’t stupid) and I think “homeless” should mean primarily renting an apartment. Having zero shelter shouldn’t have a word, it shouldn’t be a thing.
Do you really think people with “difficult lives” are so stressed out because they forgot to take the garbage out multiple times? Seriously? Christ 😂
That was quite literally my family. Or, is. Is my family. Yet they refuse to just… Take out the trash earlier so they don’t need to remember right before they sleep like the countless months of consecutive weeks of forgetting. They complain about having no time for anything but refuse to order online instead of going to two Targets, two Costcos, Bj’s, Walmart, Stop & Shop, Walgreens, Aldi, Lidl, and five international stores in the same day for fifteen hours, back to back Saturday and Sunday, and having to wait until Monday night to sleep. You know, to buy the same things you could buy from Amazon or from those stores as a delivery order. There are other things they can do that they just don’t do, and blame me, the person wanting things to be easier, for ALL of the problems caused by them not wanting to change because God didn’t make lazy people. God STILL didn’t drop a tree on me or kill me with lightning like I demand every day. Stop trying to impress a concept.
Do you realize that every bit of your comment just validated everything the other person said?
Bro I’m fucking insane
You really are lmao…
Yeah, being spit on and manhandled by adults as a 7 year old kid every other day in “school” does that to you. You’re broke? But your shirt has a man on a horse! You’re rich and spoiled. How could you have ran out of soap months ago when you’re wearing a polo ralphy whatever shirt? Maybe get less Airopostale and buy soap, so easy!
Yeah, thing is, my mother would spend a couple of grands on stupid ugly brand clothes, while screaming at me to shut up about body wash and juice. It’s “why do you come to school smelling horrendous” AND “why do you think you deserve body wash when there are people who have nothing?”
Today I wear ZERO brands and I finally get to shower with soap, drink juice, and brush my teeth with toothpaste. Childhood is the worst part of life.
JuST oRdEr onLinE
You HAVE to realize that there are people who can’t even afford the groceries in the first place?! Not everyone is your mom wasting money on stuff they can’t afford! Some people don’t have it in the first place!
After this I’m convinced you’ve never seen a single actual difficult day in your life, sorry. To say that you’re “traumatized” by having too much food in the fridge and spending too much money on buying stuff is fucking hilarious, though.
I know that obviously. Those people aren’t doing that crazy shit. But they can make life easier with planned meals and an easy routine, why deliberately make your life harder?
And this just reminds me of how that fucking bitch took so much food from food banks and never used it ffs. Every Monday a church had an open pantry, that bitch forced everyone to go stand in line separately to get extra. I hated standing in lines so I’d spend every Monday at a library until 7pm and take the long way home for 2 hours. I never actually saw the pantry or what came from it, just the line.
I was abused and neglected as a kid. I had brand name clothes, but smelled bad and only ever ate top ramen and cup noodles. All of that wasted produce was that woman’s. DRINKS were never available. No juice, tea, etc. If I was thirsty I would pretend to shower or wash my hands and drink the bathroom water.
I was institutionalized for a disorder I never had. That woman lied to get me in the institution, and they made me stagnate and regress. I’ve only lived 3 years of my 27 year life. No one believed I was neglected because mommy is rich and I have clothes with old men’s names on them. They’d assume the 8 year old kid is at fault for having no lunch, no signed permission slips, bad BO, filthy hair, etc. Like I chose to be that way. How can I be suffering when my shirt says Abercrombie? Neglect from rich parents is horrendous.
I couldn’t buy my own body wash until I started doing paid surveys at 15 years old (lied my age on PayPal and the site) and dog sitting at 17 on wag & rover. Before that, I used to steal the trial sizes and stretch them as long as I could.
So I’m fighting CPTSD and trying to cut ties and move out. Praise Amazon.
What are you talking about? Do you think convenience is free?
It costs the same amount as overcomplicated lives. And if you’re saving so much money by living on cup noodles and 4 hours of sleep a week, you wouldn’t have much time to use it.
OP, someone with a different routine for chores is not “vehemently against an easier life” lmao.
They’d still manually go shopping instead of ordering online for literally the same price or a literally trivial higher amount. Like imagine going in person to buy toilet paper for one and a half dollars cheaper than buying online. Like bro you spent more than 1.5 USD in GAS or public transit going there bruh!
I normalized my crazy mother. Seems like everyone isn’t my crazy mother which is a good thing. I don’t wish my childhood on anyone. Imagine having the resources to live a better life and have more experiences, and NEVER getting them, and you’re not allowed to complain. Imagine being the stinky kid, and being unable to NOT be the stinky kid. You know why you’re stinky, but calling out your mother makes you spoiled and entitled.
I feel like you’re dealing with some problems and blaming them on different things. Being stinky as a child and your mother not allowing you to wash yourself is something totally unrelated to going to the grocery store versus using a delivery service.
Idk, it seems like you’re really upset. Tone doesn’t come across well on the Internet and I can tell this thread has you defensive already, so let me be clear when I say that me saying you’re upset isn’t me trying to somehow dismiss things you’re saying because you’re emotional. I know that sometimes when I get very upset and emotional, I have a tendency to see things as connected when they’re not. Even when I know I’m being overly paranoid I can’t help it. It appears as if you’re very upset about the way your mother has treated you and you’re expressing frustration about it. None of us can know what you’ve been through. It sounds like you’re trying to express a lifetime of anger in a few comments. It’s just not going to come across clearly.
When you say “how can people not want to improve their lives” with the context of what you’vw just said, it sounds more like you’re lamenting that your parents didn’t let you properly bathe yourself. But without this context, it just sounds like you’re just being angry at people for frivolous things like choosing to go to the store instead of using a delivery service. (And there are plenty of reasons to want to actually go in person.) It sounds as if you have gotten into a million arguments with your mother during your childhood about these sorts of things. Now, I’m really only guessing here, but it sounds like you’re seeing it all as connected. You’re seeing the abuse (?) your mother put you through by not letting you bathe as “someone refusing to improve their life” and perhaps equating it to arguments you’ve had with your mother about using delivery services so save money. But your mother not allowing you to bathe/not providing you with what you needed to bathe as a child isn’t your mother “refusing to improve her/your life”, it’s neglect.
Because it sounds like you’re processing some issues, I don’t think an Ask Lemmy thread is the right place to do it. Because when you accuse folks of going to the grocery store instead of using deliveries or criticize their methods of doing laundry/taking out garbage, it just sounds like you’re being an asshole.
I hope you find your peace.
The one thing that every human has in common is their ability to complain about anything, an alien race could come and solve every single problem on earth, with every single need want or desire fulfilled and we’d still complain.
We thrive on complaining, we need to complain.
I’d agree with you but your post is way too long! Uuuuugh! I almost burned a whole calorie writing this reply!
I don’t know what you’re referring to. Most people love conveniences and automation. There are extremely few cases i can think of where people choose the hard way instead of the easy way when the results are the same.
Name some specific examples of what you’re talking about
Because all those nice-to-haves and conveniences in vehicles make it harder and more costly to repair.
Today a classmate showed me the mechanism for the gas door opener her company manufactures (assembles). It’s a bunch of rods, a motor, a control board, springs, cables, etc, that run throughout the vehicle.
The fuel door on my '99 Cherokee?
A hinge and a spring.This is obviously one small example but i feel that this example of over-engineering for very little benefit extrapolates well.
Imagine just not having a vehicle lol imagine spending less than $1000 once and being able to get around oh right that’s horrible we should buy huge metal boxes that require government licenses that cost so much, and fuel that costs oh so much, and complain about not having money. Right, that bitch on a bike is the reason why you have no money, not the fact you spend ten times the amount you accuse young people of spending on Starbucks on an inferior travel method. A developed country is not where the poor have cars, it’s where the rich use public transit.
Wow, you’re miserable. Good chat.
You would flatten a child to wait in a McDonald’s drive thru a minute earlier but I’m miserable on my scooter and bike okay sure Jan. Imagine riding a bike in a park, that’s so horrible, you should ride a fake bike with a video of a park instead. Those TVs should have fake wind as well. And while you’re at it, project a fake window gif onto your wall. Cars ruin cities.
Dude, did you miss a med, or something? There’s unhinged, and then there’s whatever the fuck i just read. A ferret on meth wouldn’t be able to keep up with this line of “reasoning.”
No I grew up neglected by family, abused in an institution, and dehumanized by society until I changed my name 3 years ago. I also hate cars.
A developed country is not where the poor have cars, it’s where the rich use public transit.
Tangentially, this cracker of a quote is from the mayor of Bogotá IIRC. It is very accurate and I’ve often used it too.
It is absolutely not safe to ride a bike in my city. I live in a third world country and the roads are not lit well, and the busses ride in the bike lanes as if they were not there.
In fact, the bike lane on the cities main road through the city put the turning lanes in the bike lanes, so good luck not getting hit by a car from behind.
Honestly in my area cyclists are hated more than Osama bin Laden so I can sort of relate to it being unsafe. I know being in a car would be way worse for my mental health though. Do what’s safe and easiest, and never forget what car companies stole from you. Cars ruined your city, so big companies can get more money. Big companies selling an inferior travel method. Cars are primitive, reliable eco friendly public transit is the future.
Bruh… What
Cars are unnecessary money pits that can be replaced.
When you’re stuck in traffic, think about how that is normalized.
Probably because in most cases, doing so requires a tradeoff of some sort. Hardware, design and planning, upkeep, data privacy and reliance on external factors/services etc.
So when it doesn’t fit together and people don’t even have any real source of help (not to mention enshittification) it should be no wonder that the existing way (or “live with it”) is the only real option.
Also there is also the angle of some “easier” options that sound nice on paper but end up creating their own problems (or are just too expensive to be viable).
Probably because in most cases, doing so requires a tradeoff of some sort. Hardware, design and planning, upkeep, data privacy and reliance on external factors/services etc.
Then don’t rely on external servers and shit. Don’t get cheap unreliable devices. Don’t use a smart speaker. If you want voice controls then buy a burner android and make an app that converts your voice to a string, and passes it to your smart assistant of choice. If you can text Alexa, you could do what I just described. Learn to code if you don’t know how to literally tell a robot what to do.
So when it doesn’t fit together and people don’t even have any real source of help (not to mention enshittification) it should be no wonder that the existing way (or “live with it”) is the only real option.
It’s the most appealing option to people scared of technology who like to victimize themselves over their Hard Life instead of actually making it easier.
Also there is also the angle of some “easier” options that sound nice on paper but end up creating their own problems (or are just too expensive to be viable).
So having no sleep, no time to relax, and the same lack of money is better?
Yeah! just pull yourself up by your bootstraps!
What the hell is wrong with you… just DO it…
jesus, do you even listen to yourself?
There’s a solution for everyone. Figure it out and implement it. There’s no need to spend all the time you’re not working or sleeping, doing chores. I’m just traumatized by having zero time as a child. Spending more time per day than Amazon ALLOWS you to work as an adult, grocery shopping as a child, and coming home to decade-old chores once again put off to unload groceries quick enough before I won’t be able to shower and get dressed in time for school, while being screamed at by the entire family that the problem is ME, how is my fault the whole house is a disaster, and not the mother who makes everyone spend 30 hours buying stuff she throws 99% of out.
For the majority of people, doing all that you described is a lot more work than just flipping a light switch. Let me explain with two xkcd comics, first:
You say write your own program as if that was something everyone can do on a whim. Even experienced programmers might find relatively simple tasks can hold possible complications. So it’s not as easy as just doing it. But most importantly:
I have to get up to turn off the lights possibly once a day, most of the times I turn them on/off I’m already walking past the switch, but let’s be generous and assume once a day I have to go out of my way to turn them off, and let’s be extra generous and say it takes me 30 seconds to do it, so spending more than 12h trying to automate that is a waste of time because it would take me more than 5 years to gain the time I saved back. However, my Christmas lights are all plugged to a smart plug, because otherwise I would need to turn them on individually once a day and turn them off individually before going to bed, and buying a random smart plug I can control with my phone took me way less than that time, so it’s worth it.
You seem to think automation is always worth it, but sometimes it’s not. It depends on how much it costs (be it in money or time) vs how much you gain, and also you need to contemplate how much you lose. For example my Christmas lights are on smart plugs like I mentioned, technically someone might be able to hack them, so I wouldn’t put my computer on one of them, even though it might be useful to measure power consumption, because someone might theoretically turn my computer off so the possible drawback outweigh the benefits of measure the consumption. Sure, I could design my own smart plug and use it, but that would take me a long time and I’d rather spend that time with my family.
Honestly, I live a slow life. Time is the main thing that I have. I dabble with programming, but not really for android and I don’t even use a “smart assistant”, I don’t even have mobile service due to cost and lack of need.
My idea of making life easier was ripping the carpet out of my room. It is much easier to sweep a wood floor and I can do it at any time.
Even the things that I would want to automate in my life I don’t think I could make a robot to accomplish it (honestly, I have a dusty 3D printer after upgrading to a beta dual extruder pushed complication a bit too far for me, as I already disliked the design/tolerances iteration process).
My main issues right now are related to living on the edge of nowhere, no way to meet people+nothing to do, no ability to move (without being homeless), low water pressure, polyester clothes/sheets that don’t get clean. None of those are really fixable with automation. EDIT: Also (lack of) healthcare. That could be automated (particularly just for better-than-nothing) but not by me, obviously.
I don’t think anyone is actually against having an easier life, but that it’s a problem of not being able to see the forest for the trees.
Making the plan in the first place is difficult for a lot of people. Following the plan can be orders of magnitude more difficult, particularly if someone is entrenched in a routine.
My view is that the perceived difficulty of changing your life is greater than the perceived simpleness of the current process.
Maybe there is some brilliant way to automate my most tedious chores. But then I’ve got to spend cognitive power directed at a task I find tedious. It might be easier to do things the way they’ve always been done rather than to think and try out new processes which don’t always work.
Life is pretty hard though, and you can’t change everything. I don’t know if that means you shouldn’t try, but I understand someone’s desire to keep their head down
Making the plan in the first place is difficult for a lot of people. Following the plan can be orders of magnitude more difficult, particularly if someone is entrenched in a routine.
Making a plan is effort, but you can make the plan as easy as possible. My plan for home living is to have zero chores throughout the week. Only one day a week I will do chores, and it’ll be 1 hour (2 hours if I have animals). Imagine coming home from work and having absolutely nothing to do, so horrible ugh I should be cooking, cleaning, and grocery shopping until it’s time for me to leave for work. Having time to unwind, shower, and sleep is for tech bros 🙄
My view is that the perceived difficulty of changing your life is greater than the perceived simpleness of the current process.
Maybe there is some brilliant way to automate my most tedious chores. But then I’ve got to spend cognitive power directed at a task I find tedious. It might be easier to do things the way they’ve always been done rather than to think and try out new processes which don’t always work.
Spend cognitive power once. Then “never” do it again. I’m never mopping, vacuuming, grocery shopping, or washing dishes. If I have animals I’m never feeding them, giving water, cleaning waste, grooming, or bathing them. All of that can be automated, so I’m automating it. Am I really going to spend my limited time on earth cleaning up dogshit?
Life is pretty hard though, and you can’t change everything. I don’t know if that means you shouldn’t try, but I understand someone’s desire to keep their head down
You could change a LOT. For starters, you really don’t need to drive to Costco for groceries. You could spend those hours doing something much better for yourself instead of going into traffic to complain about the traffic, walking in a crowded store to complain about the crowded store, wait on a long line to complain about the long line, then load up the car while hopefully not being screamed at by some tiktoker about putting the cart away, then drive home in the same slow traffic that can be lapped by a toddler on a three wheel scooter going up a hill, then unload the groceries for an hour and spend more hours trying to fit it all into the overfilled refrigerator and freezer you didn’t check before leaving, and then finally checking the time to see that you will be late for work if you don’t rush and get dressed and leave in the next twenty minutes. That actually can change, and whatever extra costs are probably as high as the amount you spend on gas, car insurance, Costco membership, anti stress supplements, weed, and impulse purchases made to cope with having to pull all nighters every weekend. You could just, not, pull all nighters for one fucking chore.
You sound like you’ve never had to care for yourself or a home a day in your life, and have no idea how the real world functions for anyone but the most privileged and entitled.
You’re in for a real eye opener once you venture out on your own (or not, if you have the kind of privilege that would generate this mindset, I have a feeling you’ll always have someone to go around after you cleaning up your messes and you may never get the slap in the face from reality you so desperately need).
Yeah I’ll have my rude awakening when I can come home from work to zero chores and responsibilities, and do these chores like a speedrun on the day before I go back to work. The people cleaning up after me are robots, actually. Just floor cleaning bots. The money I didn’t spend on everything a car needs will be spent on Amazon prime, subscribe & save, and fresh delivery.
Privilege didn’t make me crazy about automation, actually my crazy ass mother who spent 30 HOURS grocery shopping every week making children pull an all nighter every Sunday did. Sunday was spent going to every grocery store ever on a fifteen plus hour excursion, then unloading for hours into a packed fridge of stuff that mother owned that no one was allowed to touch, then taking out trash which took hours because of trendy celebrity Superfoods™ that mother bought that she let spoil into black sludge that was always all over the kitchen. I will never let my life without family be this horrible. When I cut ties I will have the easiest life ever.
The thing about adulthood is that if I can’t achieve my ideal life Right Now, I can WORK towards it, unlike a child who has to just deal with it. It’ll take a while, and a lot of planning and WORK, but I’ll achieve it as soon as I cut ties with family.
You managed to take a paragraph about growing up with enough money to go on several hour long grocery trips every week to keep a fridge full of food that nobody had to eat to not go hungry… and tried to make it sound like it was the struggle that motivated you to greatness.
I hope you gain some perspective man. I really do hope you’re the very young Tech Bro I pegged you as because you’ve got time to grow out of this nasty behavior… best of luck to ya.
So yeah, all that stuff belonged to that family’s mother. Everyone lived on cup noodles despite a thousand (or MORE ffs) dollars being spent and wasted every week. I was skimped out on the most. That woman could buy whatever some Celebrity Doctor said to buy for $100 but wouldn’t buy me body wash for months, and blamed my poor hygiene on a disorder I didn’t have. Being neglected by a rich parent is horrible because you’re not allowed to call them out without looking ungrateful or spoiled. You become “entitled” when you complain that you couldn’t shower, have school supplies, or brush your teeth with toothpaste because your rich mother who just bought you a laptop didn’t buy them.
Adulthood is awesome. I can drink… JUICE! When I’m THIRSTY! I can drink something with my meal, and eat something that is NOT cup noodles or top ramen! I can shower every single day with SOAP! And if I run out of soap, I can buy more because I can work. Life is worth living now that childhood is over. I’m honestly glad I didn’t attempt suicide, all I had to do was wait it out.
Oh yeah and I was telling that woman she could buy less stuff for herself but she insists on trying to vacuum seal produce that rots anyway bro. If I had that money you bet half of that would go to like Saint Jude or something and I could sustain a whole family on it while giving everyone comfortable lives where they don’t need to smell bad because mommy needs to eat what kim kardashian eats.
And this gave me perspective on…
Just now MUCH money that woman literally threw out!
And
That my neglect was much much worse than I thought. I lived like I was minutes away from being homeless, every day until I got my first job as a freelance dog sitter. Like stretching everything with water, having dirty clothes to stretch laundry detergent, using the shower like a bidet, sleeping when hungry instead of eating. When all of that was unnecessary as shit bro. I thought I hated that woman the most I possibly could but now I resent her more.
And how the rest of that family just TOLERATED that! The one relative originally doing the driving for the grocery excursions was a secondary breadwinner, and she died the other day. She paid half the bills, and that wasn’t enough for that mother. That mother would scream and berate the relative for NOT driving and standing around for 15 hours in her days off. If that relative had more than two days off, then she’d be driving and standing around on all of them. Her WHOLE LIFE was just work, driving, and Candy Crush and now she’s dead. Her daughter replaced her as the grocery excursion driver. And I AM THE FUCKING PROBLEM for suggesting ordering online!
Man. That woman should have never had kids. She married the stupidest men who probably settled for anyone who’d pay them attention, had all these kids she just used for money and neglected. Bloody hell when my online stores pop off I’m gonna donate to some charity to prevent this shit no fucking child deserves UNNECESSARY suffering. There’s being born in an unfortunate situation (poor, homeless, etc, which shouldn’t even be things but whatever) and having rich parents who deliberately withhold basic necessities. Suffering for NO FUCKING REASON bro.
I don’t really disagree with your opinion, but I don’t think it’s all a one-size-fits-all solution for everyone.
If it was easy for people to change, they would. Like honestly, nobody wants a hard life. But there’s lots of reasons why people don’t, and you can’t always tell what they are as an outsider looking in
It’s not. Find a solution that allows you to manually do the least amount of housework possible. This way, a bad day or a horrible illness doesn’t turn your home into Asmongold’s.
I feel like OP is high during the whole process of making this post and replying to comments. This shit is funny af
No, just remembering horrible experiences. I hate that family and that family’s mother more.
I am not making fun of you nor judging the way you want to live, i just don’t agree with it, that’s all. Keep living as you wish, but just so you know the way you present this to people is flawed in some ways.
I am going to come across like a condescending dick here, but real talk: Does Amazon have an EAP for access to counseling or therapy? If so, and you’re not leveraging it already, I think you would benefit from doing so.
I agree with some of the sentiment you present in this thread, if not all aspects/means (the points about simplifying aspects of your life in general are well taken), but if you’re not trolling even a little bit it sounds like you’re suffering a lot.
Smooth, predictable operation requires forethought, planning, and willingness to stick to a process. It’s not nearly as fun as living in the moment and improvising.
It’s fun having peace of mind though. It’s fun being able to binge movies without suddenly realizing you forgot something important. It’s fun being able to nap without waking up in a cold sweat because you forgot to take out trash for the tenth week in a row. It’s fun being able to forget the time and get immersed in hobbies.
Oh, I completely get it. It’s a battle of delayed gratification versus instant gratification. I can take care of business now and have stress-free fun later, or I can have fun now and let future-me deal with the consequences.
Or you can have fun now and have no consequences.
Huh?
Automating labor without ensuring it doesn’t impact people’s ability to obtain needs and wants is objectively worse than them continuing to work
I’m not talking about work as in jobs, I’m talking about housework. Everyone has at least five jobs, taking care of their home is four of them.
I’ll complain endlessly about the state of modern society, with social media and constant screen bombardment. But the other day:
The dishwasher was running.
The robovac was running.
The washing machine and dryer were running.
The magic litter box was cleaning itself.
I sat back and cracked a beer.
Yes, this is the way. Watch TV. Play a game. Play an instrument. Sleep. Write stories. Draw. Do online courses. Make a game. Create jewelry. Visit a park. Lay around and do nothing. LIVE. Why spend this time manually doing what a mindless robot can do?
Now go further. Use Amazon Subscribe & Save to buy non-Fresh groceries automatically every month. It can be set as frequent as every week to every 6 months. Set and forget. Sell your car. Spend more time for yourself instead of trying to impress God.
Eh. Fuck Amazon and fuck Jeff Bezos. Use your free time to go to a farmers market and buy staples from somebody who’s not a shithead.
Use my free time to go to a farmers market to buy produce from finance bros who bought from costco and are selling it at a markup acting like they’re “foreign” alongside “handmade” jewelry bought in bulk from Temu and AliExpress? I’d rather use the service that gave me a job and the opportunity to grow even more. I didn’t need a degree or diploma to work at Amazon. (I graduated high school, it’s just that the diploma has a gross embarrassing ugly birth name that I wish to cut out of my life) I didn’t need references or anything else that would have brought my horrible past into relevancy. And I’ll be able to take college courses all free, and I get $$$ this holiday season on TOP of overtime pay. All of this opportunity given to me, a rando who went to hiring.amazon.com and picked up an available shift. I have no merit. (well I do but I hide it lol) I’m a loser. A mistake. Scum. Yet I’m making $22/hour bringing in $1000 a week after taxes with 55 hours. Tell me more about this shithead who is much worse than actual scammers on the street manipulating your empathy to sell overpriced “organic” “fresh picked” produce bought from costco.
You’re calling out vendors at farmers markets as “finance bros” while simultaneously on a tangent defending Jeff fucking Bezos?! What color is the sky in your world…?
Gray
